Hello all,
It's been long, it's been very very long. But I've found my way back to writing - finally!
News is that everything is new, the way I feel, where I am and what I do. I hear you saying: "Again Janet!", but yes it's new AGAIN.
I'm pregnant - 9 / 10 weeks. I feel it some days, some days not at all. My first 8 weeks were a nightmare, it started around 5 weeks when I started coughing up mucus like crazy (also probably because I quit my occasional smoking at 4 weeks), I had nausea like crazy and was constantly super tired. Some days I still feel sick but not that sick as I was in my first 8 weeks, constantly feeling like vomiting and it was 24/7. At the moment I could even say that I don't feel pregnant anymore. Makes me worried as well because I wonder if the baby is OK or should I be happy about the fact that I don't feel constantly sick anymore? Going from one extreme to the other in about 30 seconds. I have positive thoughts though and love to think there's a magical event happening in me. Let's see how it plans out, hoping for the best but ready for the worst. It's crazy when you haven't had your scan yet and the only thing you can think about is "is the baby okay?". It is a lesson in itself, I know, to stay calm, centered and trust trust TRUST that everything is well and I'm safe, being taken care of and protected.
I know I am, but sometimes life likes to play tricks on us or teach us lessons which are painful but necessary. I'm just scared of the lesson here. Maybe I should just accept that I can't change the outcome, either way. Or maybe I can? They say mother is connected to the baby in every way, even thoughts and feelings! Today morning when my bf kissed me I could feel a warm buzz in my lower belly like the baby was smiling and feeling so loved and protected. Maybe it was just my second chakra feeling the nice vibration of the happy emotion or maybe it was the baby! Who knows.
I will keep writing 1 post per week or maybe more. Anyway I wanted to keep a diary on my feelings.
(PS. My poor bf has been pretty OK with my hormones this far however we have had some arguments and even some light physical fights, and I did rip off his pocket one night.)
Anyway - excited excited excited is all I can say.
Best,
J
It's been long, it's been very very long. But I've found my way back to writing - finally!
News is that everything is new, the way I feel, where I am and what I do. I hear you saying: "Again Janet!", but yes it's new AGAIN.
I'm pregnant - 9 / 10 weeks. I feel it some days, some days not at all. My first 8 weeks were a nightmare, it started around 5 weeks when I started coughing up mucus like crazy (also probably because I quit my occasional smoking at 4 weeks), I had nausea like crazy and was constantly super tired. Some days I still feel sick but not that sick as I was in my first 8 weeks, constantly feeling like vomiting and it was 24/7. At the moment I could even say that I don't feel pregnant anymore. Makes me worried as well because I wonder if the baby is OK or should I be happy about the fact that I don't feel constantly sick anymore? Going from one extreme to the other in about 30 seconds. I have positive thoughts though and love to think there's a magical event happening in me. Let's see how it plans out, hoping for the best but ready for the worst. It's crazy when you haven't had your scan yet and the only thing you can think about is "is the baby okay?". It is a lesson in itself, I know, to stay calm, centered and trust trust TRUST that everything is well and I'm safe, being taken care of and protected.
I know I am, but sometimes life likes to play tricks on us or teach us lessons which are painful but necessary. I'm just scared of the lesson here. Maybe I should just accept that I can't change the outcome, either way. Or maybe I can? They say mother is connected to the baby in every way, even thoughts and feelings! Today morning when my bf kissed me I could feel a warm buzz in my lower belly like the baby was smiling and feeling so loved and protected. Maybe it was just my second chakra feeling the nice vibration of the happy emotion or maybe it was the baby! Who knows.
I will keep writing 1 post per week or maybe more. Anyway I wanted to keep a diary on my feelings.
(PS. My poor bf has been pretty OK with my hormones this far however we have had some arguments and even some light physical fights, and I did rip off his pocket one night.)
Anyway - excited excited excited is all I can say.
Best,
J
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